I know that many people are not keen towards being mentored,be it alone or in a mentoring group and it is understandable. It was my same reaction but I was reacting because I did not understand what it actually meant to be mentored. There is this whole hullabaloo of coaching versus mentoring but I will not go into that now. I am simply sharing my journey with you- what I went through or to be more exact,what I am going through in this journey of mentorship and discovery.
“ Values aren’t buses…. They’re not supposed to get you anywhere. They’re supposed to define who you are.”
Jennifer Crusie
We were a group of 15 ladies and one of the assignments was to figure out what our values were. Over the past blogs, I have been alluding to it but I can tell you this- I realized that these values were not cast in stone where I just go up to a mountain top and read it. No, I had to dig deep within me and all this digging was just leaving me hollow. All because I needed to wade through the swamp of life experiences, get stuck in the miry clay of pain and hurt.Then haul myself across the desert of scars till I get to an oasis where I would quench myself with the first drink of enlightenment.
Did I get that enlightenment? I did. After really going through the quagmire. The quote above says it all. Values are not buses,they have not taken me to where I am right now but they have shone a light on who I am. So yes, I do value creativity, compassion, authenticity and freedom but you know what’s funny- these values magnified more about who I am.
They showed me that it doesn’t matter how much I get hurt, how much I am rejected. Love that is true and unconditional does indeed exist. It is seen in my mothers love for me even when I drive her crazy, in my siblings who look after me when I am down, in my friends who don’t expect a perfect me. I am loved.
I also began to see that I need to take each day as a precious gift and enjoy the life that God has bestowed upon me. Smell the flowers. Live with passion and abandon.Life is indeed a gift and I must be all I have been created to be because there have been moments when it has been a thin life between life and death but I am still here. I have been given this life by our creator to live it to the fullest.I am redeemed. And always will be.
I also realized that it is not enough for me to just live but I need to live on purpose with purpose. Influence the people in my sphere however small it may be. I have been created for a reason, to change lives around me. I may not be sure what it is exactly but if I do my very best with what I have, one day I will reach my destination and leave a legacy because the lessons are in the journey. I am chosen.
“Won’t you help to sing,these songs of freedom? Cause all I ever have, Redemption songs,Redemption songs.”
Redemption Song~ Bob Marley
With all of this, a song is rising up in me. I hear the tunes- the bass guitar of life in the background, the piano keys of love and the ‘adungu’ notes of legacy. I am hearing them in bits and pieces but my blood is roaring and I am charging up to go because finally I am taking possession of what has always been there. There is an exchange taking place. I am excited. Why? Well, I am excited to learn more,to experience more,to play the songs of my soul. Because that’s who I am. This is me!